


Louis' Monologue

by MGirl113



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Broken Louis, Crazy, Crazy Louis, F/M, Hearing Voices, Hurt, Hurt Louis, Hurt No Comfort, Insane Louis, Insanity, Louis-centric, Major Character Undeath, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Minor Character Death, Monsters, Past Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-17
Updated: 2017-05-17
Packaged: 2018-11-01 23:01:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10931823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MGirl113/pseuds/MGirl113
Summary: Louis' thoughts while locked up.





	Louis' Monologue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [narrywings](https://archiveofourown.org/users/narrywings/gifts).



"AUGH!"

_I ram my shoulder into the wall for the last time. My sides are sore from the impact. My throat is dry from screaming. My face burns from tears._

"HELP!"

_I call one more time. Why is no one here? Am I really alone? No. I'm not alone. It is here. With me. Watching my every move._

"STOP!"

_I yell, as it claws as my back, raking it's sharp, unforgiving nails across my wrists. I feel it's palms caressing my neck._

"Shh. It's okay."

_I hear her voice again. Daddy used to tell me that monsters weren't real. Teacher used to say not to be afraid. Sister used to tell me it was all just a bad dream. Family used to tell me it was okay._

"PLEASE!"

_Family isn't here anymore. I miss family. God, how I miss them sometimes._

"WHY!?"

_Why am I here? The man in the suit says it's for my own good. Lady in the scrubs tells me I'm going to get better. Friends used to tell me I'm insane._

"NO!"

_I'm not. That's not me. I'm not insane. I'm not crazy. I'm just different. I'm special. I see things that no one else sees. I hear what no one else hears._

_So why am I punished for doing what I'm told?_

"I'm sorry."

_I didn't want it to happen. I didn't want to get locked up. I didn't want to shoot Mommy. I didn't want to stab Daddy. Which Daddy? I didn't want to drown Sister... I didn't want to do it._

_She told me to._

"Do it."

_She wants me to hurt them. Hurt Myself? Okay. I just really want to get out. I haven't seen the sun in months. My son. I have a son?_

"I will help you."

_Help? Help hurts. Help feels like a monster. Raking it's sharp nails across your wrists. Palms caressing my neck._

"I love you."

_Love me? I love you too. I want to make you happy. I'll do it._

"Do you love your Mommy?"

_I do. Love my mommy. Mommy gives me good advice. Tells me what to do. Helps me live my life when I don't want to be alive._

I _f only she was still alive._

_Still here. I hear her every day. We had so much fun._

_But then she turned bad. Bad mommy became the monster. Raking her sharp nails across my wrists, palms caressing my neck. I want to tell her to stop, but the words come out choked. I'm choking. She's choking me._

"H-HELP!"

_Black dots dance across my vision. I see a light. A flashlight? A fire. There's fire. My throats is on fire. It burns. Her eyes burn with hatred. Mommy? Why, Mommy?_

_I can't breathe. I feel her hit breaths down my neck, giving me goosebumps. But no one is really there. But she is! Why won't you believe me!?_

"It's your fault."

_Don't hold it against me. You don't know what happened. How long have you been here? Who are you?_

"It's time, Louis."

_A little voice tells me. Her voice. A lost voice. I've lost my voice._

_Is...Is this really the end? Please just let it end. Endless pain._

"AH!"

_Suddenly, she drops me. I drop. Tears dropping down my cheeks. But I didn't fall. I was already on the ground? What happened?_

"What's going on here?"

_Man in the suit bursts in, clanking the bars of my door. I wince. Hurts my ears. With the hurt would just end._

"The monster's gone! Where did she go? What happened!? Help me!"

_I beg to him, but he doesn't listen. He never listens. Nobody believes me._

"You're coming with me."

_Me? Where? Where am I going!? Oh no...no, no, no..._

"Rehab. Two more days."

_The white room? No! You can't make me. I've been there too long! I just got out! You can't take me there!_

"But that's where the monster lives!"

_I try to get him to listen, but he doesn't. I grip the bars with such force that my knuckles turn white. White... White? No, I can't go back. You can't take me back!_

"STOP!"

_He grabs my wrists, cuffing them. I'm trapped again. No, not trapped. It's all one big trap! Mommy coming back..._

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"

_I thrash and kick and scream. He calls for help. I don't need help! I have to get out! Someone help! Not your help._

"Ow!"

_I feel a needle pierce my shoulder. Not again. I can't...go...back. Black. I black out..._

_I wake up. Something's here. Some thing, or some one._

"M-Mommy?"

_She smiles. I cry, begging her not to. She laughs. I'm still crying. Mommy never had sympathy for crying. She never had sympathy._

"Welcome home."

_She coos. I'm scared. Where is home? I have no home. They say home is where the heart is, but I have no heart. No home._

"That's right. You're home is with me. You're mine now. You belong to me."

_I'm not yours. I'm nobody's. Not your's. Not the man in the suit. Nguyen the lady in the scrubs. Not the white room. I don't belong here. I don't belong anywhere._

"It's true. People like us don't belong here. We belong together. As a family."

_Family? Family isn't here anymore. I miss family. God, how I miss them sometimes. Family used to tell me it was okay._

"Okay? Please, Louis. You will never be okay."

_Okay? I can be okay. I am okay. I'm normal. Why don't they believe me? I shouldn't be in here! I just want to be out! I just want to be gone... please be gone._

"Gone? Mommy will never be gone. I'll never be gone. I will always be with you."

_No. No! I don't want to be with you! I want to be alone! Not alone! Just leave me alone! I've never had anyone else! Nobody else? Someone else?...Please. Don't leave me alone. All I've ever been is alone. I don't want to be alone..._

"Oh, Louis. You are alone..."

_I look up. She's gone. I almost want her to come back. Come back, Mommy. I don't want to be alone. But...I am alone._

_I weep for the rest of the night. I cry. The monsters don't come after me. I miss their company._

_I cry myself to sleep that night. Just like every other night. Awaiting for the voices to come back the next day._

_They always do..._

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so i gifted this to narrywings becaise holy shit do I love Normalcy so I kinda write this inspired by that work. It's amazing! Everybody go read it RN!


End file.
